30 days into my challenge.

Wow! I made it through the first 30 days of my challenge. I am proud and deserved a gift. My Yoga Wii is calling my name. I am really exited - maybe I will be able to do it tonight after my regular workout? Maybe? Yesterday workout involved a lot of jumping and I am just happy I don't have anybody living downstairs - I wouldn't want 200 mammal jumping over my head 64 times. Of course, I counted it. My daughter next room even said "Oh Ogh". (However, it is possible she said it because she pooped. In that case, I really should of checked on her, because in the morning when my husband said. "It smells horrible" I went to check on my daughter and sure thing she smelled like a rose and looked like one too)

Where was I? Oh yeah, jumping is fun! NOT... Otherwise my routine yesterday included dancing, skateboarding, tennis. It is more fun than just running for sure. Have I mentioned I cannot stand running? Did I really?

I feel better about myself and sometimes even feel sexy...ish. That goes totally against my moral "I am a mother of two small children, who has no other hobbies besides caring for her children, all three of them (10 months old, 2 year old and 36 year old)

Work your butt off

Day 2 of the workout was slightly better. It was mostly upper body, which doesn't involve lifting my butt in the air too much. Tennis was sort of fun - something different. I went through the calendar and finally understood why active makes me work out on weekend. It wants me do it 2 days and break 1 day. So I guess, I have to make it work. Today I should be resting (nice!) Supplementation is much better since I put it in the car. I'm also doing OK with the food (with minor exceptions). Water consumption is good. So, overall I am on good track with both feet.

WII Active wants to combine tomorrow upper and lower body exercises and that will involve jumping again. I know it's necessary, but I swear, every time I jump, I am affraid to land in the apartment downstairs

One step at a time

When I got on the scale I was sort of hoping to be pleasantly surprised with my weight loss, since I already did so much. Well, that didn't happen. Lost 1.5 pounds since about 2 month ago (2.5 since January). Could of being better, but I do definitely feel difference in some clothes.

I switched at some point to pants with elastic band, because they are more forgiving to my fatness and because they don't scare me with the numbers. Instead of freaking out over being size 16 (I was size 8 before), I make a small upgrade from size L to XL. Not to bad - just one size difference instead of 8. I know, it is stupid, but it is not easy to be gaining weight and still feel good about myself.

I went through my clothes last week and picked my skinny clothes from when I was in my 20's. I ultimately said good buy to my 20's putting it into the donation back. I figured, even if I get down to 120 (I can dream), I probably would no be wearing a skirt that just covers my butt. I will find new pretty clothes for my 120.

Speaking of 120: WII Fit insists that that's my ideal weight. I'd be happy if I get to 160. I think my point of failure was always workout - that's what made me give up last time. However, when I got pregnant for the first time I wasn't working out at all, so maybe it will work this time. Because I want results, I picked high impact training for the 30 days challenge on WII fit and it sat me up with training 30 minutes a day 5 days a week. I was dripping sweat by the middle of the workout, but still was able to get to the end of it. I am just hopping that will start getting easier. I mean, my butt will start getting lighter, because it is not fun lifting it in air jumping or even running

Oh, well. I guess I should just put one foot in front of the other.

Guess what

I've been putting it off for long enough, but finally this day has come. The big workout day. Something that makes it all not so easy. The big W (and I don't mean the washroom)

I nearly died in the process, but I did make through the end with my WII active and I did take measurements too. Here is a big secret

weight 207.5
BMI
measure breast 41
measure waste 41
measure hips 52

Shortcut to the vending machine

Still adjusting to the supplementation.
I have it at work and at home, but probably should have it in the car too, since I cannot always remember to take when I have to. However, from the food stand point I am not doing too bad with some minor exceptions.

Here is what kills every dieter - little things we're trying to ignore or pretend it didn't happen. Let's say you need to start writing everything you eat. You will write breakfast and lunch and dinner. If you prepare your meals at home, you probably would be able to write on Sunday evening your food diary for the entire week and most likely it would look flawless. But how about the cup of coffee with cream sugar you picked up on the way to work? And does it mention the donut from the lunchroom even if you only ate a half. At 3 pm you sad, "I will not say if you won't" to the twix bar from the vending machine. Cookie (what cookie?) while you were cooking dinner for the family? Fine, maybe it was not a cookie, but you know what you ate could of as well be a cookie.

Somehow, i think most of this stuff will never make its way to your prefect food diary. I do not want my meal planner to be ugly. Do you? And I do not want anybody else to criticize me. Because even if you hide it, there is a chance that somebody else will find it (even 100 years from now) "why did you eat a chocolate bar if you are trying to loose weight".

Yey, I can call myself stupid all on my own. Get away from my dairy you stupid criticizer and no good person from the future.

Have you ever seen a really big person in a cafeteria eat a really tiny (Mary Kate Olson size) meal? And you see it day after day. I know this lunch won't keep me going for more than an hour. But this (let's call him Bill) Bill is 300 pounds eating a small lunch and sometimes mentions in conversations that he doesn't eat sweets, because he is just not into sweets. Sure, whatever you say Bill.

Our perfect food diary is just like Bill snicking to the vending machine at 2.45 and munching Twinkies out of the desk drawer. Trust me, he knows how to get to the vending machine unseen (he doesn't want to be judged) and how to get his desk snack out without any noise, but at the end of the day he is still 300 pounds

I ate a piece of chocolate, two pieces of pie and while I was feeding kids in the evening I ate the last piece of Tuesday pizza
Here, I said it.
Do I lose a pound if you say the truth?

How to love yourself and feel good about it

Pizza last night!

I guess, I had my cheat for the week. My husband wanted to celebrate and he had a tiny reason to do so and I had nothing to eat at home anyway. My daughter loved it and my son probably really wanted it, but he had to stick oatmeal cereal and apple sauce because he is 9 months old. I did take my evening pill before to soften the hit just a little bit.

I already got myself a gift for 30 days - it is a Yoga WII game. For once it is not food gift. I got on Amazon for under 3o bucks and since the deal was good I bought it ahead of time. Ordered it on Tuesday and got it on Thursday. I keep it in the car still sealed to make sure nobody opens it, because it is mine. To make even nicer, I've been using Swagbucks (web search engine), that gives points for searching. I redeemed my points for this Game, so I paid NOTHING. Love it!!!

Don't listen to skinny people (especially if they are kids)

Well, I am 1/5 of the way done, but have still a long way to go to make it work. Definitely not going to look for two piece swimsuit, but I hope to actually wear a swimsuit instead of workout pants. Wearing workout pants and top in the pool makes me look feel not good at all. Last month I took kids to the pool and a five year old asked me - "Is this your swimsuit?"

Common! Since when five year old care what somebody else is wearing? When I was five, I didn't think I cared what I was wearing. Go away little girl - ask your mama stupid questions. Let fat woman enjoy herself and pretend swimsuits should look like this. I bet, if I put a wet suit on, I would look 10 pounds lighter ( wouldn't that look like fun).

Loved the phrase from "Drop Dead Diva" on Lifetime that ends with
"...step away from the cookie" (need to find the whole thing)


Enough about that. I am still working on supplementation - I remember half the time, the other half I would take it right after. Could be better, but not that bad. I still might have to push next step to Day 25.

Few people told me I lost weight - I'm not sure if they are lying or not _ I am staying away from the scales, but will have to get on it eventually.

Good thing I actually felt stuffed on Saturday and said I can't eat anymore. Don't remember that feeling. Most of the time it is just "I am hungry". It is all about what and when you eat. The schedule enforces eating and drinking. I've heard before "if you're thirsty, you are body already dehydrated. You should drink before." That's how I feel about eating: If I wait until I am hungry, I can't shut my pie hole. I eat and I am still hungry. If you're trying to control your appetite, you should it more often and before getting hungry. I really compared how I eat during the week when I am on the schedule vs. during on the weekend, when I run with the kids and almost forgot to eat. I didn't have my breakfast til 11 yesterday and was hungry again by 12.30.

Well, I am a work in progress.